"safe mode"
 

I have a 2006 TSX with 150K miles. I have changed oil faithfully. Last week I came home, no problems. Next morning, it would turn over, start but won't really run. Occasionally hit high rpm. I changed plugs and old plugs were black. Local Acura shop (30 miles away) said car is in "safe mode". I took it to my local Honda shop, and supposedly they hooked it up (dash was saying "check emissions") and found no codes. Now they say engine is shot ($4500 replacement) because "sludge buildup" has caused it to jump time. Again, refer to "changed oil faithfully". I don't know if this is computer diagnosis or trained tech diagnosis. My question...can (and how do) I get it out of "safe mode" to take it to another shop for 2nd opinion?? Will it hurt to drive it if and when I can get it out of mode?? Better yet, anybody got any other ideas about what might be causing this problem?? Also, when standing in front of the car, which side is #1 piston so I can double check timing??

Thanks for any help